Writing a get your ex back letter that hits home is not that complicated, but few women do it right. Below, you will learn how to do it you will see an example too.

Writing a proper get your ex back letter involves understanding what your ex is thinking. When you know how a man thinks, you can orchestrate a letter that is impactful.

Timeline of His Thoughts

After most breakups, there is contempt by one or both of you. Your ex recalls the negative things about you that have been driving him crazy. You are doing the same.

After a few weeks, his negative thoughts turn to missing you. Of course, this only happens if you loved each other and filled your lives with many wonderful memories. If you didn’t, or you only dated for a few months, move on.

Once, he misses you, he will look to see where you are. He’ll ask questions. Does she still love me? Is she still available?

This is when your ex pops up on your social media or seeks information from your mutual friends.

Many guys are stubborn. Their egos keep them from directly reaching out to you. This is when you strike!


ex back letter

Timing the Get Your Ex Back Letter

With the timeline above in mind, your letter should be sent within one week of the breakup. Waiting too long has less of an impact and becomes odd. Send immediately so you can contact him in a few weeks. Don’t send him the letter and immediately contact him.

You want to throw him for a loop by toying with his psyche. He just broke up with you and he expects you to beg and apologize to get him back. But you’re not. You are doing the opposite of what he expects, and this lays the groundwork for getting him back.

He realizes he’s not in control and his timeline accelerates. He misses you sooner than if you didn’t send him the get your ex back letter.

The Get Your Ex Back Letter

The letter needs to be short. One paragraph only. Write about one powerful memory and say goodbye at the end using his name.

Now, I know what you want to do. You want to write a 3,000-word novel about every feeling you ever had and tell him that you will change and that you will wait how ever long you need to wait.


Please listen. The biggest challenge going against what your gut tells you to do.  He needs to think he is losing you, even though he is not. This creates your best odds of getting him to come back.

The letter:


I’m sad our relationship has run its course. I will never forget making love under the apple tree at Jonathan’s Farm. I will miss you.

Goodbye, John,

That’s all you should say. This letter is short and impactful. The get your ex back letter has one powerful memory that reminds him of something good. His name is at the end with finality that will drop a pit in his stomach.

Adjust this letter so it makes sense; just make sure it has these three components.

Get Your Ex Back Letter | The Next Steps

Obviously, this is only one component of the Five Step Process to Get Your Ex Back. You will contact him directly after a few weeks, just when he starts missing you. You’ll use something called Slip in/Slip out. This allows him a window of opportunity to say hi and express his feelings if he is ready.

Meanwhile, you are re-building your confidence and assessing the breakup to determining what, if anything, you did wrong, and you will formulate a plan to fix it.

Live your ideal life by jumping outside your comfort zone and breaking your routine.

He’s watching you, and when he sees the woman he first fell in love with times ten, he will question whether he made a mistake.

For more on the letter and the no contact rule, read Step One.

You can also learn more on the impact of a breakup on men here.

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